I want to write a book, and I am the only barrier in the way.
I want to write a book. Technically, I have a basic plot planned, and I have actually written at least a few thousand words. The problem for me is that my mental health is constantly wavering. I feel hesitant to even tell the world (or the select few who may find this post) about my mental well-being because it is not something I speak about to people. I’ve only told one of my close friends, my husband, and my mom. Though my husband is the only soul to have witnessed my health in real time.
Anyway, I haven’t touched my typewriter (yes, I write on a typewriter; how unique and quirky of me) in several months. Which means my book hasn’t progressed either.
I cannot rely on my mood to be stable, and I am more often than not feeling down than feeling “normal.” My creative juices are not flowing and have not for a while. All I can do lately is waste away watching bad reality TV or play an insane amount of Stardew Valley, both of which of I really enjoy, but I rely heavily on those activities to dissociate from my mind.
While, yes, I am in a funk, I’m trying to weave myself out of it so I can get back to my baseline self.
I hope to one day work on my book, and maybe even publish it if ever possible. For now, I will continue dreaming, and work my way to enjoying and participating in my passions and hobbies.
Send positive thoughts and if you’re feeling fancy or like you want to open up, feel free to email me. I know I’m not the only one experiencing these struggles, but speaking and relating to other people may be helpful to both of us.
See you on the farm.
-Olivia